Friday, April 01, 2005

Terry Schaivo

Marie, if I ever get as sick as Terri Schiavo, if I fall into a coma for some reason, and trusted physicians pronounce that there is no hope for my recovery, I want you to pull the plug. I want you to do this because I love you, my children, and grandchildren, with all my heart, and I would not want my vegetative state hanging over your heads, creating undue mental and physical stress, or a financial burden on any of you. If the time ever came, I know you would make the right decision.

Being married to me, and since we share our innermost thoughts with each other, you know a lot about me. You know that I am a economic conservative but a bleeding heart liberal in other matters. You know I love my children so much it hurts. You know I can’t sit still. You know I take way too long to tell a story. You know where my itchy spot is. You know I pee sitting down. And I know more about you than anyone else too. I know your aspirations, what brings you pleasure, that you are deeply committed to your job, that you value integrity above all, and that you are entirely too ticklish.When you agreed to marry me, it was a magnificent moment. I think you are a brilliant and special human being, and the fact that you agreed to be my wife makes me feel special too. And without question, neither of us took the decision to become husband and wife lightly.

When people marry, in our society, and are serious about it, they carefully weigh the pros and cons of marrying a person. Will this person be a good partner for me? Will they honor me and care for me in times of sickness and in health? Will they share in the decisions of running a household with me? Will they be a good father or mother? Will they work to make our house a home? Is he or she mentally stable and not mentally or physically abusive? Will they fold up the map right? All kinds of things are considered, when marriage is in the offing, or at least they should be. Some serious, some quirky, but all important.

And marriage not only requires that each couple become satisfied and firm with their decision to marry. Each person’s family must also grant that the marriage will be respected as a new and important bond, one that trumps all other familial bonds. The independence that comes with this grant is very important. It frees a couple to feel as though they are making their own way in the world, that they will rightfully make their own decisions regarding their own family matters. It makes it incumbent upon them to be productive and dignified members of society, and good parents. It sends the message to future generations that marriage is serious business, to look forward to marriage with a serious attitude. It tells young men and women, as they enter marriage, that they are expected to act with dignity and respect toward their partner. So by gum, ya better be careful when you select your mate. It’s the big time. And that is the valuable lesson Terri Schiavo reminds us of. Because when you announce your intention to marry, as an adult of legal age, that you are gonna take this man or woman for your lawful, cherished and trusted husband or wife, it’s the end of the line for Mom and Dad. You, and your husband, or wife, though there are two of you, are flyin’ solo, and that is how it should be. Choose well.

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